Sunday, April 26, 2015


Wanting to cry is like wanting to throw up
Nobody wants to but we all feel better for it afterwards
There is also nothing worse than the nausea of tears
Feeling my face preparing for the waterfall, though not granted such relief
The reason for the emotion being of course that the physical does not match the mental state of me
My mind sees me holding you, hugging you and basking in your warmth
My skin feels empty and cold and nothing at all and this is in dissonance with me
When I close my eyes I am kissing you, licking you, biting you, tasting you
But my lips remain dry and even the sweetest food tastes bland instead
A thousand times I have imagined the smell of your hair, your skin and you
The air instead is acidic and pungent and even sweet fragrances leave me without opinion
This is why I want to cry
Because though I am with you, I am completely without you
The tears sit behind a dam, creating a sense of nausea, as if to further my dissonance with myself
Where my mind is crying but my body refuses to comply
The onion ninjas spite me by not coming to my rescue
I am where you aren't and I feel like the store sign with one letter missing that never gets fixed

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