Vices and Explosions

Quitting my vices

Like one last goodbye 

Like one last kiss 

One more "I love you"

Something about it that is so attractive 

Even with all the warning signs 

Yet the obsession with feeling good 

With something that isn't 

From cigarettes to junk food 

It always crosses the mind that I shouldn't have 

It is as if danger sits quietly in my blind spot 

Sitting with the smile of evil patience

The kind that accompanies slow death 

My determination to stand resolute

In the face of the hard slap that comes in slow motion 

Even though I know I can move and duck this at any time 

But instead of getting up and walking away I sit right there 

Sitting across from death on the other couch staring back 

As if willing him to get to me sooner 

Leap across the room and sink his teeth into my neck 

Only pausing to say "you had your chance"

Death doesn't flinch however 

In his slow, yet finite evil patience 

Choosing instead to see if I have the will to get away

Get up off my couch and walk away 

No last goodbyes to my vices 

Not pulled back for one more deathly kiss

Instead, set it alight and walk away 

Without looking back

Because cool guys don't look at explosions

© Rahul Chidambaran 2015

Exhaled Fogs

You hold my hand but you don't know
What it means to me I don't show
What it means to breathe and not grow
Why the world does move so very slow

I know you look but you don't see
I react quite constantly
I prefer to live in my make believe
Here there are no fallen trees

Would you come with me to the other side
A place where you and I can hide
A space were we don't have to decide
A time when we have never lied

Of course now that is wishful thinking
What's real is this feeling sinking
I am alone and slowly blinking
Far from me you are shrinking

You are welcome to enter my illusion
Your being here is no intrusion
Your being near there's less confusion
The air is clear and there's no pollution

Sick of moving with the mob
Bored of smiling at the job
I refuse to sit down and sob
Got my eye on the door knob

© Rahul Chidambaran 2011

Brownian Motion

I wrote this a few months back in my notebook, though when this blog began I was unsure if online I should put. It is here now at the request of Ms Violet, she said she really likes it. Here goes...

Dynamic systems reaching equilibrium
We heard the notes when we were younger
Paths that cross but never meet
The same space under our feet
Collide before time runs out.

Shine the light on
I don't think I've ever heard this song
We may have never met before
Except before this time long ago.

A puzzle we'll never piece together
Perhaps the answer's in the beer
Becoming vivid where it is unclear.

As we wait for another night
When we meet under those dim lights
Relativity holds back the time.

On a bus or a train
Where we might have met on the same plane
Though sadly we looked the other way
Until that day...

© Rahul Chidambaran 2011